This is an Emergency!! Serious School Incidents

Not all education issues are sudden, turn into a panic, flip your life upside down or it’s an emergency that needs to get resolved right now. Some issues are slow and build over time.

This blog is about emergencies. The sudden ones.

If shit hits the fan fast, this is the go-to page.

Some people find my site and contact me because other people are telling them, “You have got to talk to Kim!!” So, if there is a page you want to pass along to another parent in need, here it is.

Emergencies are different territories.

What is the district thinking?

If this is an emergency situation after an incident, you will not be the only one realizing that this is a big deal and it could snowball into something so much worse. Trust me. The district knows too. They are NOT going to want to show it on their face or in their emails that they are aware of how bad this is. At least not until they meet with you. They are going to be curious and wonder:

• How do you feel?
• How mad are you?
• Are you going to be controllable or are you flying off the charts?
• Do you know your rights?
• Will you even mention a legal process?
• Are you going to threaten the media?
• Will you call the police?
• Will you be consulting with a lawyer?
• They will be assessing you – do we think this person has the resources/capacity to make this painful for us?
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They want to get into your head.

Why?

BECAUSE YOUR REACTION WILL TELL THEM EVERYTHING THAT THEY NEED TO DO.

Their goal is to…

1. Keep you satisfied enough, but not give or do too much.
2. Keep this internal and as quiet as possible. They want to be able to control it.
3. Have as little impact on staff as possible. (They have unions to deal with)
4. Not have any formal complaints be filed. (They want to know how expensive this will get)
5. If this ends in a settlement, it is very normal to have a settlement agreement include a release and a non-disclosure agreement. (You don’t necessarily have to sign the NDA part.)
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Their liability processes have kicked into place. They have notified the School Protection Plan and they are waiting to see if you make a big deal out of this, and if you do, what are you going to do? To read more about how schools operate from a liability framework, read my Liability in Schools page.

They may be straight with you and ask you not to go to the media or file a complaint. They will reassure you that this will be taken care of, and your child will be supported.

They may offer you an external investigation and tell you that this will be investigated. (Their investigation will not be to find the truth and provide you with this information, it will be to reduce their liability.)

You may hear that staff are on a leave.

You will notice that your child is not on their list. They show up buried in #1. Keeping you satisfied. It absolutely kills parents to realize that schools actually aren’t focused on the best interest of your child in these situations; they are focused on themselves. You can use this to get what your child needs.

So, you may find yourself in this horrible situation. You can’t even process what has occurred. You may be at a hospital. You may have MFCD calling you. You could have the police contact you. Your child is traumatized and refusing to go back to school, and you are still in shock trying to process it all. The severity of all of this will differ. The end result is still the same. Trust has been broken and your child is refusing to go back, and you aren’t sure if you can even send them back after this. You have no idea how you are going to manage work when everything has just exploded.

So, what is your action plan in all of this?

I will break this down into themes and then put all of this into a timeline of steps at the end.

Media

I know you are ragging mad right now, but I do encourage you to give yourself 48 hours before calling the media. Some parents have had success in reversing field trip decisions or exposing exclusion. In terms of stories from a “grab the publics attention” kind of stories, those are small potatoes. This emergency situation is so bad, it’s in a different category. A few things to know about the media from experience.

1. You never know what will take off. If your emergency is shocking, it could spread across the country very fast. You don’t know what will trigger people and all of a sudden you and your child are national news. Think 10 years ahead, will your child want this story in the news about them? (A human rights decision win involving a high school student showed up in over 60 media outlets across Canada and went international)
2. You never will know exactly what will be written and what parts of your interview the journalist will pull out of your conversation. It will be a surprise, and I always find it very interesting to find out what parts have been selected and what has been left out. You won’t have control over the narrative.
3. You cannot undo what is written in the media. Once its out there, it can take on a life of its own and you won’t have any control over it. Social media is wild. Years from now, when your child is an adult, they may Google the article and read all the comments, which some are going to be horrific.
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You may want to keep this in your back pocket and just know this is a possibility. But please, don’t make this decision when you’re mad. This could be used as leverage. You may feel that society needs to know about this. Finding the right reporter will be important. Please see my IN THE MEDIA page for reporter suggestions. You can also see what kinds of issues parents have taken to the media before. A lot of parents also feel that their issues are newsworthy, only to find out that reporters don’t want to touch the subject. Just because you feel that you can take it the media doesn’t mean the media will want to take it from you. Some subjects they won’t want to touch with a ten-foot pole, and sometimes the current news is just so horrific that it’s bad timing and they don’t think it’s enough of a story. I am aware of a couple of families who were shocked to find out that reporters didn’t want to publish their story.

External Investigator

The Superintendent may tell you they are going to have an External Investigator come and they will investigate everything and look into everything. These external investigators are mostly previous senior district administrators. A lot of them are retired Superintendents etc. A lot of people know each other from previous work and organizations. Some people have found them to be very biased.

Let me be clear.

This investigation is fully for them, and has nothing to do with you. This is for liability reasons. They can also use this as a way to get rid of staff they don’t want. If staff are a liability to them, they have launched into “constructive dismissal” techniques to drive them out or used investigation results to fire them. This is also something they can tell the Board of Education and/or the Ministry of Education that makes them look like they are taking care of things.

Doesn’t mean the investigation will be bad for you and not beneficial, but they are NOT going to investigate and then invite you into a meeting and tell you EVERYTHING that has occurred.

Here are some things you will hear.

1. They will not be able to tell you anything about the staff, and they will state the reason is for privacy reasons. They won’t tell you what information they found out. They may tell you the staff are on a leave, but beyond that, the information will be VERY little.
2. They will use this as a way to soothe you. This is the pacifier they will use in hopes you calm down.
3. They will offer you an interview. (They want to know ALLLL the details, and everything you know and feel. They don’t want any surprises.) This isn’t necessarily bad. Just know that everything you are telling the investigator, you might as well be sitting in front of the Superintendent and their lawyers. But, the good thing about telling them what your child is experiencing is that they can’t claim HINDSIGHT. If they know your child is struggling, they have the responsibility to figure out how to remove the barriers. Meaningful Inquiry.
4. This process also buys them time and delays the end result. They will tell you they can’t do anything until the investigation is over. The delay they hope will give you time to calm down and you will not be in fight mode. It also gives them time to think and have conversations with people about what on earth they are going to do. They are hoping you will expect less as time goes on.
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Something you may want to ask:

1. When you are done with the investigation, will you consider if new administrator procedures or policy needs to develop to prevent this from happening to someone else?
2. Will there be training for staff?
3. Will you be reporting staff to the TRB?
4. Will you be putting a Letter of Direction in the school employees’ file?
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Demand Letter or Filing Complaints

Now this is something you may want to think about.

In addition to the demand letter option, you can always look into filing a lot of complaints, depending on what has happened. To review your options, please see my Overview of the Complaint System. They don’t want you filing complaints. So you can use it.

Think about what you want for your kid. What barriers will they need to get back into school?

• A new school?
• A different teacher? Different EA?
• Moved to a different classroom?
• More EA supports/accommodations?
• A plan for bully prevention – a safety person? To keep their cell phone on them?
• A reintegration plan?
• Counselling?
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NOW IS YOUR TIME TO ADVOCATE!!

They need to make things right by your child. They will never be able to undo what happened. They can’t just wave their arms around and the shock and trauma is gone. However, they should absolutely not be putting up any barriers to get your child back into school. The statement, “we don’t do that here” should not be coming out of their mouth.

They need to do everything in their power to remove the barriers, or deal with formal complaints.

You can use the complaints as a motivating factor. You may not want to file right away, as if they don’t remove the barriers you will have more to write in your complaint. You have one year to file a human rights complaint. There isn’t a time limit from the Teacher’s Regulation Branch (TRB). You can file a TRB complaint on teachers, Principals, and even the Superintendent. You may want to see how things unfold in the next few months before you file you anything.

You could send a demand letter, outlining everything you want. With a settlement amount. Just know, that you will be signing a release to not file any future complaints and they will want you to sign some version of a non-disclosure agreement/confidentiality agreement. For them this will close and end the issue.

The demand letter could be the fastest route to get you what you want. You may need settlement money to get your child counselling or other professional supports ASAP. You may want specific commitments and promises from the district in a written contract. Human rights complaints, even with fast-tracking, can take a couple of months to get into a mediation meeting.

Demand letters are an option. I know several parents who have been successful. Both public and independent schools. You can have a lawyer send a demand letter, or you can send one yourself.

*** Keep in mind no matter what the incident, it will need to be connected to a protected ground for the human rights complaint.

Contacting a Lawyer

I know meeting with a lawyer sounds like a big deal. It is. I will NEVER forget the moment I walked into a lawyer’s office for a consultation. The office looked like something out of a movie. I was offered 5 different types of water. I didn’t even know 5 types of water existed. Geez, as long as it doesn’t come from the toilet, I am good! There is just something about meeting with a lawyer and talking about your kids’ school that just makes you want to sob and wonder WTF is going on here. What planet am I on???

The money you spend on a lawyer could be sooo worth it in the long run. You are getting legal advice. There aren’t any missing blind spots. They can write up your demand letter or human rights complaint for you. They may think of things or be aware of things that you haven’t even thought about.

They can do the labour that parents find keeps them afloat. You can focus on your kid and the lawyer can deal with the school.

I have a lawyer on the list that I refer out to. I have never met this person. I have never talked to this person in any form of communication. There are no benefits coming to me at all when I make this referral. I have heard such positive feedback from parents that this is the law firm I pass along to everyone who wants a specialized education lawyer referral. There aren’t many who specialize in this field, and he is one of them. Here it is:

Vancouver Law Firm | Kesari Law Corporation

For a list of free legal consultation services, here is my list. Some parents have found pro bono lawyers who are willing to help.

Contacting the Ministry of Education

For public schools – the Ministry typically doesn’t respond to individual issues, but when you have issues that involve a group of children, then they respond. Action happens. They just won’t tell you about it. If nothing else, you leave a paper trail and documentation.

For independent schools – they have an independent investigator at the Ministry of Education. If your emergency reveals issues at the school that harm other kids as well, you may be able to trigger an investigation. If nothing else, you leave a paper trail and documentation.

I encourage people to tell the Ministry and you can notify the Superintendent that you are doing that. They aren’t going to like it. So, you can use that in your favor as well, if you like. Sometimes school districts need a little nudge. Or it can bring you some peace knowing that other people are aware.

Appealing a Decision

Both public and independent schools have appeal processes.

For public schools its called Section 11 under the School Act.

For independent schools, they will have their own process you will need to ask about. However persuasive they may be that they don’t have one, they need to have one, they should have one. The Ministry of Education will tell you to go that route.

Contacting the Board of Education

Each Trustee is responsible for a zone in your district. They are elected as a method of accountability and oversight for the district. Contacting them and letting them know what is going on is something you may want to consider. It will make the district administration sit up straighter when they know the Board is aware.

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ok, so we have now arrived at the timeline.

An emergency happens. Everything explodes. Now what?

Steps to Take

*** Advocacy in emergency situations can be similar to slow-burn situations because we still need to be focusing on our child’s disability-related needs and removing barriers. Children have a right to feel physically and psychologically safe at school. Duty to accommodate still applies.

The first step is going to feel awful, but it is an absolute must to consider.

1. First and foremost, take care of your kid. (This isn’t the awful part.) Their needs are the priority right now. Have the conversations with the hospital staff, police, MFCD, or anyone else that you need to be having. AND HERE IS THE YUCKY PART. While you are doing this, think documentation. You are going to need evidence that your child felt as horrible as they did. You will want to take pictures of their injuries at their worst. Not day 5 of healing. You may want to take videos of what is transpiring. It may feel like you shouldn’t have your detective hat on while you are trying to take care of your kid, then give the task to someone else who is with you. The more evidence you have, documentation for ALLLL of the processes and interactions with the school, the stronger of a position you will be in to advocate for your kid, for barriers to be removed, and for a possible settlement for them. If you show up to the school and your 7-year-old is in handcuffs. You need to record them screaming.
2. Reach out for help. Consider contacting a lawyer and ask for an urgent consultation. You need someone, a support person, to just process your own emotions and be able to think about what you need to be doing. Getting a counsellor may be very helpful, AND you will be documenting your own harm, as you may also want to file a human rights complaint on your own behalf. #3 is also at the same time as #2.
3. Go to the top, immediately. Typically, there is a chain of command you have to climb in order to get to the next person. In these emergency situations. Screw it. Send an email to the Superintendent and Secretary-Treasurer, and ask for communication/meeting as soon as possible. You can cc: the Director of Learning, the District Learning Support person, your child’s principal. Whomever you want. Give them a timeline of 2 days to respond. 24 hours if you want to in some cases. If you don’t get a response, go to the School Board, and the Ministry. The Superintendent will want to speak to the staff with the most direct knowledge of what happened first, before they speak to you. Let them know that this is extremely urgent and time-sensitive. There is a chance that they have already heard about the incident, and they are expecting an email.
4. When you meet with them, they will be thinking about all the points I mentioned above. How mad are you? Do you know your rights? They will then need to go back and discuss and get back to you. They will be reassuring you that they will take care of this and ask that you don’t do anything yet until you meet again. They will want to keep this internal, controllable and as quiet as possible. You want them to know that what happened is serious and you are not a doormat, without necessarily saying that. You need them to do what they can to support your child. But you don’t want to come off as uncontrollable or unhinged. You still need them. Collaborating with them in the best interest of your child will help you all move on as soon as possible. But if you don’t make a fuss or ask for things, they aren’t going to offer it.
5. Over the next chunk of time, email them back and express requests as your child needs them as they transition back into school. Be as persistent and consistent as you need to be to get your kids needs met. You have your power of the possibility of formal complaints; they have their own power as they control your child’s education. As much as your instincts are telling you to gut them like a fish, you are so mad, if there is a win-win here for everyone, I would suggest you try to find it. Get your kid what they need and move on in your life. If you are going to sign a settlement, make sure you are happy with it, because once it’s signed, it’s a done deal. There are no do-overs. If they aren’t giving your kid what they need, you have complaint options that will force them to deal with this. (unless you have already signed a release) Some administrators don’t have a lot of experience in this, and they have no idea the lengths a parent will go to for their child, and so many people are propelled forward wanting to make sure there are safeguards in place for other children to not experience something like this either. Sometimes things are just so bad, that parents feel compelled to file complaints and make this public; otherwise, it feels like we are complicit. This is a personal decision and completely dependent on your family and the context of the situation. Do what you need to do for your own peace, either way.
6. You will want to be fully aware of gathering documentation. My blogs on documentation are here on my blog list.
7. Also, be aware that depending on what happens, you may be able to file a human rights complaint under Family Status for you as well. For more info on this, here is my Family Status page.
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Your Employment

Depending on the level and context of the emergency, some people have been able to take sick days, or some people have taken a leave of absence. When your child refuses to go back to school, all of a sudden, you are left scrambling.

Your employer has the duty to accommodate you too, under Family Status. You need to officially request accommodations from your work. Just don’t quit. If you have concerns about your employment, it may be worth it for you to consult a lawyer. (See referral above).

Sustain your Advocacy

This isn’t going to be easy, and it will probably push you past your comfort zone and up to the limits of your capacity.

In amongst all of the chaos, if you don’t think of yourself and your own needs, you will not be doing anyone, including your child, any favours.

You will need your own support. Ask for help.

Here is my school advocacy help directory list.

Finally, I wish you all the best. I’d love to say that school emergencies are rare and far and few between. I have had enough parents contact me over this topic, both public and independent, that I realized there was a need for this page. If you are someone who is aware of another parent in need, please do share.